THE
POST
PATTERN
Published by the Impeccables since 1975 / Rebooted in 2022 / Volume III - 3rd Issue
We're Having Fun Now!
Through Week 5 of the NFL season, both the Packers and our pickers have started to round into shape. With pre-season in the past, we're starting to see some players and prognosticators find success.
In our third publication of the season, we once again are treated to a feature article from Dr. Buboltz-Dubs, this time focusing on Christian Watson's inury. No offense to Sadie, but Packer Nation is hoping we don't have a need for her insight going forward (unless it's for commentary on our opponents).
This week's issue brings all our normal commentary. Some Packers commentary and Heard in the Crowd are here as always. The Vault delivers yet again with plenty of 1980's glory. From scheduling controversies and funny anecdotes about Badgers Football, to Mundo's fashion choices and Hoofer's political commentary, it is an issue worth your time!
Early October means it's Homecoming season in Wisconsin, and Homecoming means it's Fashion Week at the Post Pattern! Our fashionistas took Homecoming by storm and we have the photos to prove it!
Finally, in this week's Buboltz Kids Sports update we approach the end of the fall sports season with the latest achievements of the Buboltz gang.
Grandpa Doug Leads a Tight Race
What a couple of weeks in the Buboltz household. We mentioned the announcement of our newest subscriber, Beckham Buboltz, in our last issue. Apparently the Buboltz clan was fired up with the news. Doug climbed to the top of our list, while grandson Silas moved into 2nd (tied with Coach Keller) and Bryce is now tied with Nick in 3rd place. Through 5 weeks, we have SIXTEEN pickers within 4 picks of first place. Every week we've had a different weekly leader (Noah, Jason Dubs, Silas, Blake, and then Steve/Collin tied in Week 5).
No Watson, No Doubs, No Jaire, No Problem
Coming off a week where Green Bay let Minnesota get off to a 28 point lead before eventually losing by two points, they faced a critical NFC matchup vs Sean McVay's Los Angeles Rams. With Watson going down to painful looking injury, Jaire Alexander still recovering from his injury, and Romeo Doubs suspended for the game due to disciplinary reasons, the Packers had a few concerns going into the game.
Despite an AMAZING catch from Jayden Reed that helped give Green Bay an early lead, those earlier fears appeared to be substantiated when drops were again an issue and an ugly pick-6 threatened to turn the tide. Matt LaFluer, however, demonstrated why he's getting some Coach of the Year consideration (at least by the smart football experts who happen to double as Post Pattern contributors). After Xavier McKinney, the franchise's best free agent acquisition since Charles Woodson, recovered a fumble, MLF dialed up a beautiful zone beater that allowed Tucker Kraft to break wide open on his way to a 66 yard touchdown. On the play, "Kraft YAC and Cheese" hit 19.7 MPH which is the fastest time recorded by a TE on a play this year. McKinney then notched his league leading 5th interception of the year which set up a 2nd Kraft TD.
After the Rams managed a late touchdown, and followed by a Wicks "drop" (would have been a tough catch, but Wicks would tell you he should have caught it), it was suddenly up to Jeff Hafley's defense to preserve the victory. With time winding down and the Rams driving inside Green Bay territory, Preston Smith and Karl Brooks decided to "meet at the quarterback" and pulled Stafford down for a key sack. On 4th down, rookie Evan Williams broke up a pass putting a stamp on Green Bay's third win of the season.
Injury Report
By Dr. Sadie Buboltz-Dubs
The dreaded high ankle sprain. Christian Watson suffered a high ankle sprain in the game against the Vikings on 9/29. Since then, the Packers have said that it is a “mild” high ankle sprain and not expected to be out for an extended period of time. In my professional experience, I believe he has been diagnosed with a Grade I high ankle sprain then because of the label of “mild.” A Grade I high ankle sprain still takes approximately 2-4 weeks of rest, treatment, and rehabilitation before being cleared for full participation compared to a Grade 3 which takes 6-8 weeks of recovery.
Let’s start with what a high ankle sprain is. A syndesmosis sprain (high ankle sprain) is an injury to the tibiofibular area of the body. This is the front of the ankle where your tibia bone on the inside of your leg and the fibula on the outside of your leg come together to form the tibiofibular joint. This joint is held together by a layer of connective tissue called the interosseous membrane and two ligaments called the anterior and posterior tibiofibular ligaments. It is a rare type of ankle sprain, but the majority of them occur in professional football players. This joint is injured with excessive rotation and forced dorsiflexion (dorsiflexionis the movement of your toes coming up to your nose. With this excessive movement the interosseous membrane can be torn as well as those ligaments. With a Grade I there is likely minimal tearing of the membrane and the ligaments are likely just stretched with minimal tearing of some fibers.
The injury is diagnosed with clinical tests called the The Squeeze Test and Klieger’s Test. It is further diagnosed with an X-ray to determine the amount of widening between the bones. An X-ray is also usually completed to rule out a Maisonneuve Fracture which can be associated with high ankle sprains. When Watson was carted off the field he was likely taking to the Sports Medicine Center for an X-ray that the Packers have on site at the stadium. Early treatments of a high ankle sprain usually involve a period of immobilization in a walking boot and possibly crutch use. With Watson’s injury being a Grade I, he likely only had a boot for 24-48 hours if he had one at all. Following the period of immobilization and rest, typical treatment for ankle sprains involves regaining normal range of motion and controlling swelling and pain. He was likely treated with some form of joint mobilizations as those have been shown in research to be beneficial to do after ankle injury. After the period of regaining normal range of motion and reducing pain and swelling he would move onto doing strengthening exercises and balance exercises. By the end of this week, I would anticipate him to be participating in limited team activities to ease him back into playing.
** Note ** While this report was filed on Wednesday, October 9th, the story about Watson has slightly changed since then. Watson's father has stated Watson did NOT suffer a high ankle sprain but rather a medial ankle sprain. After learning this information, Dr. Buboltz-Dubs added that medial ankle sprains and high ankle sprains have similar mechanisms of injury and similar treatment plans.
Heard in the Crowd
Love rolled in to Lambeau vs the Vikings wearing a Favre jersey. He proceeded to throw for 389 yards, 4 TDs, and 3 INTs. Spot on.
"X Gon' Give It To Ya" literally every single time McKinney is involved with a turnover this year
Kraft YAC and Cheese fits Tucker perfectly...what Packers player has the best nickname ever?
"I need a drink" from a dedicated Post Pattern reader / contributor after Love's pick-6
"Wonder how fast I was going...my glutes are on fire" - Tucker Kraft on his 66 yard TD
"The game was better with mud...Edgar Bennett is not impressed" - after DAL/PIT was delayed for weather and the field was immaculate
When told PFF had a good grading on Rashan Gary vs the Vikings, one of our readers said "Guys watching the game from the stands disagree"
Green Bay still leads the league in explosive plays through 5 weeks (22 rushes over 10 yards / 21 receptions over 20 yards), 6 more than 2nd place
Post Pattern Fashion Week!
While some consider the Met Gala or Paris Fashion Week to be the hottest fashion events in the world, the staff of the Post Pattern beg to differ. After searching far and wide for the most Gucci trends in the industry, we've determined that Homecoming Week in Wisconsin is on point. The Second Annual Post Pattern Fashion Show is once again sure to dazzle our readers with this year's high key looks.
Starting with KML's homecoming, Ms. Vanderhoof knew flowers were the GOAT look of '24 and she pulled it off with style and....wait for it...Grace. Paired with a cute pair of heels, Vanderhoof, pictured here with her date who was disguised as a rock wall, has her cousins shouting "Slay Queen"!
Moving to the fashion hotbed of Brillion, Ms Kuchenbecker paired a black leather dress (we're still awaiting comment from her mother) with white kicks. Ella chose a beautiful backdrop for her photograph, and happened to pull in a random stranger for the picture to compliment her dress selection.
Who needs a date when you have your twin sister to pose with you? Making their debut in the Post Pattern Fashion Show are Natalie and Alyssa Vanderhoof. Dazzling in red and lavender, the Vanderhoof twins demonstrate the universal fashion truth - a wonderful smile is the best accessory a girl can sport to pair with her dress.
Also new to the circuit this year, Hannah Vanderhoof stepped up her drip game by boldly rocking a fuscia dress. With fall temps dropping in the evening, Hannah elected a dress that provided elegant arm cover. In a nod to fashion legend Mary Poppins, Hannah nailed her look with a sleek umbrella that will surely be a hit on the dance floor.
A veteran of Post Pattern Fashion shows, Noelle Vanderhoof is no stranger to style. If chic is defined as "smart elegance and sophistication", then hang Noelle's picture in the dictionary. Noelle threw a nod in her sister's direction with fuscia heels that accented her outfit. Ms. Vanderhoof, seen posing here with the timeless "leg kick" pose, demonstrated that light poles are always the right accessory for fashion shots.
Also in her second year of our expose, Gwen Simmons is back looking like royalty. Ms. Simmons' choice of shimmering purple was a power move. Gwen coupled the look exquisitely with silver heels and flowing locks. This princess is ready for the ball. According to our paparazzi, no boys were allowed within 100 feet of this starlet at the Deforest High School dance.
Our final look of this session comes courtesy of Jack Simmons. Jack, channeling his inner Edward Norton, looked dashing in a traditional white button down and black pants. Mr. Simmons opted for rolled up sleeves which perfectly blend a casual yet confident look. The look was completed with a skinny tie and corsage, which happened to randomly match the evening dress of a local passerby, Emily Morgan, during the photo shoot.
Letters to the Editor
We checked the servers. They're working. The thought occured to our staff that maybe you all don't have our contact information. All letters, Packers commentary, feedback, suggestions, complaints, jokes, or donations to our College Tuition fund can go to alspals1977@gmail.com, nicksimmons21@gmail.com, or texted to 608-335-8088. We also accept written letters, fax, WhatsApp, smoke signals, or mental telepathy projections.
